Therapy, Ethiopia, and waiting (or not) …

Well … falling asleep in your therapy session is probably not considered good client - psychologist etiquette. Although according to Aimee both the psychologist and I were both, let’s say somewhat torpid. Today’s session was about how we both will cope with this new ‘intruder’ in our lives. Our focus has primarily been on all the dreams and blessings associated with having children incidentally there are some rather audacious behavioral characteristics that come gratis part of the ‘package’. I still don’t see it … aren’t babies supposed to be cute darlings … maybe this is one of those realizations that happen upon you ONLY with experience? Another thing is QT (quality time) with Aimee, well I have that on demand at the moment and this arrangement works well for me. The little darling will somehow come into our lives and turn everything upside down and inside out. Oh I look so forward to that day!

The other good news is that we have our first trip planned to Ethiopia – NEXT WEEK! Again only through God’s grace and perfect timing. Through our new ‘adoptive’ acquaintances we have an opportunity to accompany a group heading out to Addis next week. Initially we liked the idea but thought of timing and cost, well Aimee was on the net in a dash and located flights for half price, really half price and as they say the rest is history. This is a bit of a scouting mission for us, we are planning to visit 3 orphanages of which one of these may just be the one where our little ‘trooper’ will hail from. Further to that we are taking two BIG suitcases full of aid; clothing, powdered milk, crayons, books, sweets and more. I feel a bit like Indiana Jones (with Mrs. Jones) going on an expedition searching for gold or in our case a gift from God.

One whole year!

Today was our one year anniversary of arriving in Dubai and what better way to mark the occasion than by attending an Ethiopian adoption meeting? The evening was wonderful. We met three new families adopting from Ethiopia: One already completed the adoption and is just waiting for the Dubai visa so they can bring their little boy home (hopefully by Monday) and another waiting for the Ethiopian court date in three weeks time. The last couple has already visited Ethiopia despite not having their paperwork complete and are encouraging us to do the same to build a relationship with the orphanages there. They have invited us to travel with them on one of their next trips to introduce us to the different contacts we will need to make. They have a visit planned in two weeks time and then again at the beginning of August! Our hearts are already in Ethiopia but now we are praying for wisdom in our decision making.


Before arriving in Dubai we had so many presuppositions as to why God was moving us to this country. Reflecting over the last year we realise that none of these were true. Our God did exceedingly abundantly above all that we asked or thought – to Him be the glory!

Sobering thoughts

Last night we had another great session. Lots of thought provoking questions. We were reminded again that regardless of the circumstances surrounding a child being put up for adoption it is always a time of tragedy and sorrow:

Recently I was praying for our child and its birth mother. Suddenly I was overcome with the realization that this unknown woman I was praying for would not likely live to see the new year. The maternal mortality rate in Ethiopia is extremely high: 1 in 14 women will die in childbirth. Children in Ethiopia also lose their mothers to starvation and infectious diseases. Tearfully, abruptly my prayers changed from praying for her physical health and needs to that of her spiritual health. I pray God would be graciously working on her heart, giving her the opportunity to hear His word and drawing her to Him in the realisation of her need for a saviour. How glorious it would be to be united one day in His presence!

Psychobabble

Surprise! We’re psychologically within the ‘normal parameters’ whatever that means (Dennis was quite disappointed; I think he was hoping for something exceptional - he doesn’t do normal. ;) This meant we were ‘safely’ able to proceed with the homestudy and that was the only feedback we received on our two hour labour of colouring-in tiny circles!

The remainder of the session was focused on getting to know us better and we both had to dictate our life stories to this complete stranger. We also discussed our motivations for adoption, and how we plan on disciplining (yikes!). She was wonderful in making us feel at ease and we were very open and honest with her. We were able to share a bit of our belief in God and how He is sovereign over all. We ended the session feeling at peace and couldn’t stop talking the rest of the evening!

Reflecting on our statement about God’s sovereignty I was once again overwhelmed with the knowledge that God has chosen us for this amazing blessing. We are so humbled and pray that we will be faithful stewards of His precious gift.

Descending from an euphoric high…

Ahh where do I begin? We are absolutely buzzing with excitement after spending 2 hours at an Adoption Support Group meeting. We were able to meet with our adoption ‘mentors’ who have adopted 3 children from Ethiopia. Their youngest, a gorgeous 18 month old girl, was brought home just 7 months ago! They are veterans when it comes to the procedure of adopting from Ethiopia to Dubai. We were talked through the entire process step by step and assured we will be most likely bringing our child home next March/April if the program remains as it is today (it could change at a moment’s notice). Needless to explain our euphoria…

In addition we met loads of other couples who are also just starting the process. Dennis was so engaged sharing our very limited knowledge and experience thus far, if they weren’t already sold on adoption they are now!

Well I am sure I am going to crash any moment now from all the exhilaration – I just couldn’t wait to pass on the news. God is good.

Thank you all for your prayers and support!

Psychology for Dummies

(or translated to American: "for pacifiers")

Yesterday evening Dennis and I found ourselves in a surreal situation. Sitting across from a psychologist propped up in an enormous leather wingback chair clipboard in hand. We scrambled for words to relay our desire to adopt and why we had chosen ‘fashionable’ Ethiopia as our country of choice. After a brief 15- 20 minutes we were asked to complete a 567 question psychometric test (MMPI-2) to ensure there were no underlying issues that needed to be addressed before proceeding any further. The questioning was interesting at times to the point of bizarre. After nearly two hours, hands cramping, necks aching, brains fried we finally put our pencils down.

This was the first of what will be several sessions of required 'parent preparation counseling' before they can sign us off as approved for adoption.

Today I have found myself ridiculously wondering what this computer scored test will ‘reveal’ about me. Our psychologist (I NEVER thought I’d be saying that) mentioned problems detected that include bipolar, psychopathic, and schizophrenia.

I will let you know the results and whether it would be wise to avoid us in the future!

Beginnings

I always imagined this would be a pregnancy journal. Thoughts expressed of a changing body and impending parenthood. Musings over gender and which of its parents our child would most likely resemble. How blessed am I that my Father in Heaven had a different design?

God, over the past four years, has worked miracles in both our lives; drawing us nearer to Him, causing us to acknowledge our complete dependency on Him, adjusting our motivation and desires for children and opening our hearts to international adoption.

We embark on this expedition with a peace and assurance that can only come from God. As we eagerly await the day we finally bring our first child home we trust in our sovereign Lord “who works all things to the counsel of His will”. Whatever lies ahead, to His glory, His will be done.